A Year Already! Damien's 돌 (Dol)

Somehow a year passed since I met my sweet second son.

Damien's first year of life surprised me, taught me how wrinkle free parenting a baby can be. His bright, easy-going demeanor and warm, dimpled smile bring a new dimension to our family—he has transformed us into a more complete unit.

To mark his birthday a little early, I baked him a small cake to smash and taste, and Luca helped him open (and play with) a few presents. One family of friends with kids close in age to ours came over to celebrate the occasion with us and add to our fun.

For his official celebration, though, Joe's parents had the brilliant idea to meet up in Seoul so Damien could have a traditional Dol, the Korean first birthday ceremony, and see relatives who still live there—especially Damien's great grandmother.

When my mother-in-law suggested it, Joe and I, starved for good Korean food here in Hong Kong, immediately took to the plan. Also, we'd had so much fun celebrating Luca's Dol when we lived in Korea that we wanted to give our second son the same kind of party.

Have I mentioned that Korean food is my comfort food? I never liked hot dogs or mac-n-cheese, but man, things like braised beef ribs and hot kimchi soup melt away my stress (while, I'm sure, simultaneously raising my blood pressure due to salt and MSG). So, despite a difficult morning wrangling two kids and inching through the ridiculous traffic from the hotel to the party restaurant, my mood swiftly switched to party mode once those first banquet dishes landed on the table—which, by the way, was the kind of traditional table that requires you to sit on the floor.

After lunch, Damien and Luca wore hanboks, Korean ceremonial outfits made of silk, and there were a series of blessings and ceremonies I didn't understand (including Damien's grandfather, my father-in-law, shooting an arrow out the door). Then the presenter led a happy birthday song (in Korean) and explained each of the items on a small table, set out for Damien.

Each item represents something: a band of strings for long life, coins for riches, bow-and-arrow for strength and athleticism, calligraphy brush for intelligence, gavel for justice or a career as a judge or lawyer.

Damien got two picks, as you can see in this video:

To narrate in case it's difficult to understand: The presenter asks Joe what he wants Damien to pick. Because it's the first thing to grab, he picks up the coins. He asks me; I say long life. Here's the part you can't really see: The presenter shakes the coins and puts them right on the edge of the table nearest Damien. Guess what Damien picks? The coins!

"It's a set up!" I tell Joe. He laughs.

For pick number two, I help arrange things equitably. Damien dives right in for the gavel, no hesitation.

So, apparently he'll be wealthy and just. I'd say that's a good combination.

After Damien overheated in the silk hanbok, and after my mother-in-law and Joe's aunts had divvied up all the cake and rice cakes from the Dol table into plastic bags to send with each group of attending relatives (in true Korean fashion), the room emptied and Damien and Luca enjoyed their own after party (and spilled rice everywhere).